How to Trade Lies for God’s Truth about Feeling Alone

I have lived with this lie for most of my life.

“I’m alone—to fix, carry, speak, heal—all of it to manage on my own.” The Bible makes it clear that we are not alone, so I know it’s a lie.

Many verses in Scripture declare the truth of His promises. “Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand,” (Isaiah 41:10 NLT)

Often, I have felt the opposite and maintained the false belief that I am alone and need to push through a difficulty or challenge in my strength.

In 2004, I thought the information I received from my daughter’s neurologist was no exception. High levels of medication failed to control the seizures she had endured since infancy, and her doctor explained the next step was to visit a brain surgeon to discuss her options.

Loneliness flooded my body as I processed the news that my nine-year-old daughter needed brain surgery.

As a single mother of two, because my ex-husband disappeared, I was doing what I had always done: figuring it out by myself. Although this time should’ve been different as a new believer in Jesus who had just finished classes at seminary, I clung to the lie that I would be alone in making the major decisions about my daughter’s healthcare. 

The same lie I believed for so long, before I was a believer, reared its ugly head.

In the days leading up to the appointment with the neurosurgeon, I made it a priority to pray and journal my concerns with God. The Holy Spirit faithfully led me to Scriptures that spoke to my fears. “Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” (John 14:27 NIV)

On the afternoon of our first consultation with the surgeon, I felt calm and a God-confidence as he explained the pros and cons of brain surgery, along with the fifteen months of testing involved to prepare for the procedure. As my daughter’s neurosurgeon went over the details of a temporal lobectomy, the Holy Spirit was present, leading and guiding me through the process.

Over the year and a half, the Lord’s strength carried me along every medical procedure, involving risky and major procedures.

The day before my daughter’s surgery, I was called into my supervisor’s office at work. She said, “Our manager wants me to tell you that if you take time off for your daughter’s surgery, you’ll have no job to come back to when your leave is over. But I have refused to give you this news. It’s wrong.” She picked up the phone and pressed the speaker button. “I told her that if it is her decision, then she needs to deliver the message to you.”

Shock, confusion, and panic rocked me to the core.

On top of needing to be strong for my daughter for her major surgery, I was in jeopardy of losing my job. Life continued to test my faith. The office manager got on the phone and confirmed the ultimatum my supervisor refused to deliver to me. The moment felt surreal. In almost dazed movements, I left work and went home.

In God’s strength, I prayed for guidance, wisdom, and my manager’s heart. With prompting from the Spirit, I reached out to the Human Resources Department and expressed my concerns. Through compromise and patience, we came to a resolution that would work for me and my manager.

The Lord was faithful and continued to strengthen my faith.

“No one will be able to stand against you as long as you live. For I will be with you as I was with Moses. I will not fail you or abandon you.” (Joshua 1:5 NLT)

On the morning of July 6, 2007, I sat in the waiting room at CHOC Hospital with my teenage son for three-and-a-half hours during my daughter’s brain surgery. I experienced a remarkable peace as I prayed, read Scripture, and journaled.

God was with me, and I never felt alone that day or the days preceding the surgery.

Upon entering the waiting room, the doctor informed me that the surgery went well and that I could join her in the Intensive Care Unit. He then added, “Because of the resection of the left hippocampus, her memory and speech might be affected. She might not immediately recognize her surroundings or you, and she may have difficulty speaking clearly or at all.”

My strength wavered and worry set into my heart. “How long should I expect that to last?”

“It could be a few hours, weeks, or even months,” the doctor said.

With a deep breath, I leaned onto Jesus, took my son’s hand, and we made our way to the ICU.

Approaching my daughter’s bedside, I braced myself for the worst as she stirred from the anesthesia and opened her eyes. She blinked a few times and looked at me. “Mom,” she said in a groggy voice, “where am I?”

“Praise God,” I said, “it’s a miracle!” She knew who I was and could speak.

“Lord God, you created heaven and earth by your great power and outstretched arm; nothing is too hard for you!” (Jeremiah 32:17 CEB)

The trials are far from over. I revisited the heartbreak of my daughter’s seizures returning. For fifteen years, she remained seizure free which enabled her to grow cognitively and socially. We are grateful, and I know that time allowed me to draw nearer to the Lord, relying on the strength of the Lord.

As difficult as that season was for us, it shaped and refined me into who I needed to be for the Lord and His purpose.

Now, I’m encouraging my daughter to find strength in the Lord as she faces difficulties with her health and questions her physical sufferings.

Whenever faced with trials, I remind myself of James 1:2-4 “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”

The Lord will not finish until the day of completion!

Kara Adams is an author, caregiver, and travel advisor. With a background in biblical studies at Hope International University, she weaves inspirational themes into her writing. She launched Wondrous Journeys in 2024, a travel agency focused on arranging trips for individuals of all abilities, drawing on her years in the travel sector and her personal experiences traveling the world with her daughter who has special needs. Currently, Kara and her husband live in Orange County, CA. Among her hobbies are traveling, reading, and spending time with her adult children and stepchildren.